Thank you for reading this blog! I enjoyed writing here. God bless you people!
I love you
That’s why I left you
Cos you will never be happy
As long as you’re with me
I am a tragedy
A walkin catastrophy
A ticking time bomb
A death wish
I’m so happy I broke your heart
Because I know you’ll loathe me
And I’m fine with that my dear
As long as you dont see my decay
Those tears you cried for me
The curses you shouted at me
Its a melody to my ear
Cos I know you had enough
Please hate me forever
Don’t ever think of coming back
I’ll just rot here in darkness
And turn into naught
I don’t really have an insomnia. This is just my subtle way of insulting the people who apparently cannot sleep for one night and goes blabbering about it on facebook because it’s cool I guess? Well, insomnia, for those of you who doesn’t know, is a sleep disorder that disables a person’s ability to sleep. Being unable to sleep for a night is not effing insomnia for the love of God people. I just think its moronic to announce to everyone that you are a nocturnal human being and you are like Batman or something. You look stupid. Believe me.
Well, I don’t really have anything interesting to say. Just can’t sleep.
Where are you?
Ive been looking forever, you know.
Are you hiding?
I really doubt it.
Do you know how much time is already wasted?
Or maybe you just don’t care.
You are not the one looking, so its basically not your problem.
Your job is just to exist.
And mine is to find you.
Which is kind of sad.
Because I don’t know how to find you.
Or I don’t know.
Maybe I won’t find you.
Because maybe you don’t exist.
I am just pretending you do.
Because being lonely sucks.
Life is kind of sad, you know.
You’d know that, if you exist.
But even if you don’t.
I wouldn’t know.
I’ll just keep searching.
And nothing else would matter.
Except finding you.
In this void.
In this time.
In this emptiness.
And into the darkness I succumb
Keeping me pure and mutilated
Severed my peace with loath
My sins left unapprehended
Deeper and deeper I subside
Into the heart of unending rot
Rage-filled terror emerges
Devouring everything on its path
I was so happy today! Let me tell you about my day!
I was walking happily along the park. I saw children playing and lovers of course. They were smooching and kissing and oh what a lovely sight. They were giving me these friendly nods like we were already friends! What delightful creatures! There were old people just enjoying the view and watching the sunset and it just brought a smile to my face. It was a perfect day where everything was in order.
I took my machine gun and fired at everybody! They were screaming and shouting in pain! There were blood everywhere and they would just beg for me to stop. But of course I didn’t! I wouldn’t want to waste these beautiful day right? Everyone was running around, trying to save their lives! It was like conducting my own orchestra! What a masterpiece.
Well, after the bullets for my machine gun went empty, I had to stop. I was sad but quite content with my work. Oh well, I can always go back anytime! I wonder which park I would go to next. I wish there were more children!
Death came to offer his peace
But I refuse, the fuck is this?
I would rather fade softly and quietly
Than carry the weight of my misery
Its never solemn, it seldom is
But honesty is my catharsis
Bludgering mess of a human I am
Blame me? Blame you? Blame fucking them!
Oh I know you do not understand
Who, for fucks sake, really can?
Wallowing in your shit, ain’t you?
Dont worry, none of these is true
Well, you are blind. You walk down the street and you heard a noise. It is a weird sound, to be completely honest, and a very alarming one. You are essentially shocked, like all the normal people’s reaction, and you just get the hell out of the place. But obviously, the problem is you cannot run as this may seem dangerously stupid to do for someone as blind as you. So you walk briskly but very carefully away from the source of the noise. You don’t think the sound is that dangerous but it won’t hurt to be cautious. Besides, you heard people screaming. Screaming is a sign of trouble, isn’t it?
Good logical reasoning, except one thing. You are dumb as fuck. You are as stupid as your neighbor’s dog. So instead of going away, you go towards the noise. Which is what all dumb fucks would do. But the weird thing is the closer you get to the noise, the more quiet the sound gets. Which is so not shocking, because the fool that you are has no sense of direction. You have no idea how to go towards the sound. Which is fortunate because the sound you are hearing is actually an alien invasion.
And so the aliens are actually invading the earth because why the hell not? They are superior compared to us in all aspects so what the hell could they actually gain for colonizing this pain-stakingly awkward blue ball of dust out of nowhere in the galaxy? Well, none to be honest. But for the sake of me not having an actual plot device to actually make sense, then let us fucking have an alien invasion.
And so………… (at this point, I ran out of ideas to keep this blog post going so I’ll just end it abruptly and suddenly)
Is it raining because its lonely?
Or the rain just a timely cry?
Of times worth holding on to
To the times of solemn sighs
The soft whispers of serendipity
Combing softly above your head
Forever trapped in a nostalgic entity
Of meaningless poetry and dread
And it grows under my skin
Potruding slowly into my eyes
The sound of melancholic screams
And the sight of nonchalant skies
I am very sad these past few days. I don’t know why. It’s just these random episodes of melancholic bursts and impulses that puts me in a lousy shape. You see people around you and you see through them. They are all trying to get by and you just watch them with such hatred and jealousy. Its not normal to not want to be normal but sometimes its a curse to be someone who tries to act so differently just to prove how unique you are as an individual. But its irritating to confess that I am not in the place I wanted to be and I don’t even know where I want to be. Its a maddening thing trying to figure your life out. One moment you are just tagging along the flow of the universe and the next thing you know, you are commanding your own ship. How the hell did I end up here?
The thing is, people do not really care about other people. Let us admit it. No one in the whole freaking universe cares about other people. They may look like they care, but its just a social responsibility to act curious or concerned. And that is so fucking depressing, knowing that people doesnt really seem to give a shit. They say affectionate bullshits to someone and you know and feel that they do not mean a single word. Holy mother of..
You roam around facebook and all you see is I love you, I love this, True Love, destiny, feelings. Motherfucker. That is the phoniest thing. And it is very disappointing that I cannot relate to that. Why can’t I fucking relate to love. Oh right. Because it is so phony. I can see through people posting this shit on facebook and I want to believe that they mean it but I fucking can’t. It disgusts me. People are trying to romanticize everything to the point where it blurs the line of emotions and love. If it interests you just a little bit, its supposed to be love? motherfucking God.
Believe me, I dont want to whine. I want to relate to everybody but I just cant seem to find a way. Everybody just wants to outsmart everybody. That is so fucking depressing down to the last bone of my freaking body.
Yeah. You just read through that post. Judge me.